Long Time No Speak

So its been a long time since I've posted anything and I apologize. You deserve more than just a two second explanation of who I am. We started this journey into discovering this life together and I'm not keeping my part of the bargain. Since my last update so many things have been happening lately. Its like my world has been ripped apart and thrown upside down so many times I've gotten whiplash.

First things first. I've learned a very important lesson. It's not about me. My world isn't necessarily mine. It revolves around the people I care about the most. My friends, however few times I do converse with them, they're going through the same things as I sometimes worse. My family. My mom is loosing her job this month because of "outdated equipment". So I have to be there for her in this upsetting time. It's scary to think that just a month ago t

hings were fine and everybody was okay.

I don't blame anyone for being scared when your afraid that your going to loose everything that you've worked so hard for. Its hard knowing that the bed you sleep on may not be under you for long. Or that you may not get any food this month just to pay your rent. It's so much more than a scary feeling of knowing that this may be one of the hardest times of your life and yet its not going to be over anytime soon. Slow breathing and day dreaming can only blur the reality for so long.

Okay so the second thing in my life. Well last Thursday me and my best friend went to a concert an hour away and we were completely blown away by these bands. Mot only were they amazing life, not even their albums held a candle to what they really sound like live. They were so breathtaking and really energetic. They were also some of the nicest boys you'd ever meet. They may not look like your typical guys but they are so sweet! And the lead singer of one of the bands, Motionless In White, gave some of the best advice on stage that night. "Be whoever you want to be and don't ever let anyone tell you different" just to sum it up. So tonight I'll suck up all my fears of rejection and nervousness and be who I want to be. I'm not going to let MYSELF be the one holding me back. Tonight is the moment of truth.